Cute Stories

 

It's cute how my 13 and a 1/2 year old still finds his mom for a hug before bed each night. If Mom is already asleep he finds dad for a hug. We love this boy so much!

Today the kids had distance learning, school from home. Athena started her math worksheet saying "This is so easy! It's just demonic fractions."

"Decimals and fractions" Mom corrected.

Family Reunions

We left Japan, flying over the friendship festival at Yokota Air Base. Looking out at the Americans and Japanese crowded together to eat, walk, see cool planes and purchase or sell items. The base groups make a lot of money from this event each year. It’s a big deal. I however, have never attended! I usually avoid it because I hear how crowded it gets. And there was a year or two it did not happen because of Covid 19 precautions.

This year I wanted to attend just to say I did. My family was staying in the TLF tower but we still had our blue vehicle to get us around. I was told to attend the event first thing in the morning because the Japanese are not allowed on at first. Sadly, it was raining that morning. Walking around the flight line in the rain did not sound fun. So, I did not go.

It wasn’t raining when we flew away though. We were so happy to be leaving Japan. Moving on! Flying toward our families. Flying toward our final military home. Flying toward slight, welcomed, changes in life. I don’t want to work with children the next three years but I do want to have a part time job. I don’t want to be a keyspouse. I do want to stay active in the church and serve within the church. I would like Luke to learn to drive and help drive himself and the other kids around within the next year.

I do want my children to find friends they connect with, within the church. They don’t usually do. This makes it hard for me as a parent because their friends can be bad influences.

The flight was great. There was almost zero turbulence. The children were easy and so was the flight.

We stayed one night in Seattle. We got on a shuttle from the airport to the hotel but the shuttle drove us to another pick up spot at the airport. That is when Sterling realized Tiberias had left his backpack at the last stop! Sterling got off the bus and went quickly back to retrieve it. He took too long though and the bus driver left him. At the Hotel I scolded Ty for being careless. We hopped off the shuttle and it left to go back for Sterling. Then, I realized Athena left her stuff on the bus! Immediately after hearing me scold Ty for leaving his stuff behind! Luckily, the shuttle picked up Ster and I messaged him about it. He was able to bring it off the shuttle with him.

We walked down the street from our hotel to a pizza shop and took pizza back for dinner. The pizza was delicious! We had a fun night in the hotel despite there not being a pool to swim in. We had free breakfast the next morning and left early on the shuttle for the airport.

We stayed in Provo where Sterling worked on our recently purchased (used) van. My birthday arrived shortly after entering America. It happened to be the same day Ster chose for Stupid Movie Night with his siblings. So we celebrated my birthday too.
I never did like Stupid Movie Night, lol. But we had a great time. I made a Stitch themed cake. Mom thought I was making way too much cake…but the design called for it.

Hannah gave me a water bottle. I had been looking to buy a new one and she didn’t even know this fact. I received a Stitch shirt, stickers for the water bottle, an adorable koala journal, fun earrings and butterflies for my hair.

We allowed Luke to watch Cocaine Bear with us. It turned out to be more of a horror film than I expected! I thought it was going to be a comedy.
Tiberias was very unhappy that Luke was able to watch it and he wasn’t. He really wanted to see the film. And he feels that if Luke is old enough to watch something, Ty is also. I don’t see it that way.

Nephi came over too. We watched Yoga Hosers, which I picked. It’s a stupid movie I had been wanting to see for a while. I probably wont ever watch it again though. I’m not into stupid movies.

Sterling and I have been able to play pickleball a few times. We discovered that there are free outdoor courts pickleball specific in the Provo area! And in Idaho too when we visited Jon’s family.

After Idaho we were back in Provo just a day before driving down to Logandale to visit my parents. We went to the reservoir and met up with Crystal Houston (whom I went to high school with even though she was in a grade below me) and her family. We had a great time. There was swimming and kayaking. We watched a horse pull a wakeboarder across the water. The horse ran along the beach and the wakeboarder was in the water holding onto a rope.

We had such a great stay there! Nephi came down, Florencio, Eliza and Maddie came too.
Saturday was Abigail Starnes’ baptism in Parowan. So we all went there for the day. I gave a great talk about the holy ghost at the baptism. When arrived we saw that it was a stake baptism. We did now know that prior! I wasn’t nervous really. But realized I didn’t have my talk! Where was it? Where was it? I searched my memory and saw myself place it inside Abigail’s present. A book. To keep it safe and make sure I didn’t leave it behind. Then in my memory I saw myself wrap that book. The talk was still inside! SO I had to open her present to retrieve it! Haha

After the baptism we took pictures outside the church. Families and groups etc.
We went to Alissa’s house for lunch. Justin’s parents and brother were there as well. Sub sandwiches were served. With chips and soda.
Athena got reacquainted with her cousins. Specifically Abigail and Jasmine.
Cakes were baked then Jasmine and Athena decorated them together. We celebrated Jason and Abigail’s  birthdays and Jasmine’s baptism. Gifts were given to all of those children. To avoid James being the only Starnes child not to receive a gift Mom and Eliza gave him gifts too.

I gave fun books to Jasmine, Abigail and Jason. Because I am the storytime youtube aunt.  Jason received a touch and feel book to learn the ABCs. Abigail received a unicorn fantasy book. Jasmine received one on faith which was not long or boring and had great illustrations. I wrote a special note to her inside. I also gave Alissa the talk I had prepared and printed.

Justin’s family didn’t stay for dinner but at dinner we went to a diner in town. That was fun. And we almost filled the diner with our party. At the end we said goodbyes. Those of us who don’t live in Parowan were going back to Dad’s house.
Jasmine wanted Athena to sleep over but it made more sense for Jasmine to come stay at Grandma’s house. Jasmine coming turned into Abigail also coming and then…James too. Alissa packed their sleepover bags and sent them with us.
We went to the Cedar City temple to see that on our way back to Logandale. Alissa and Justin had just their toddler Jason for the night. And they rested. They had to recover from the excitement.

Alissa’s kids hadn’t been to my parents house in a while. They were being reminded of what it was like and the fact that they have a cat! They had a really fun day and night. The next day was Sunday. Alissa’s kids stayed home with their grandpa. Nephi slept in and attended a late sacrament meeting. The rest of us went to mom’s sacrament meeting at 9am.

Florencio drove back to AZ alone. Mom promised to drive Eliza and Maddie to AZ on Friday so she could spend more time with my family.

Alissa and Jason came later that day. She had cut my parents out of her family’s life two times now, I believe. And only barely allowed them back in, in time for the baptism.

We went on a walk to find some horses and feed them. I then learned that this was not an approved activity by the owners but something dad does anyway. Oooppps. It was really fun though. I wont be surprised if a sign doesn’t show up now on their gate “Don’t feed the horses.” Lol

Monday we all went to Mesquite to swim at the rec center.  It’s nice that my kids are old enough and can swim well enough that I don’t have to be with them or follow them around. But James, near the time we left the pool, took off his life jacket and went off the diving board. He didn’t swim well enough and had to be rescued by the lifeguard. He was shooken up. Most of us did not witness the event but only heard about it in a whisper from Alissa later at the diner. We went to Peggy’s diner for dinner just after swimming.
We ordered food and ice cream! That was fun. Nephi said goodbye and went back to Spanish Fork.  Alissa said goodbye and took her kids home to Parowan.

We had fun at the grandparents house Tuesday and Wednesday also. Tuesday the kids, Eliza and I went to Crystal’s house. Athena caught a chicken and played with their great danes (one being a runt and one being a puppy). Luke went with Topher to hang out with his friends. Luke had done this during the first night at the reservoir. Went with Topher to meet his friends and have a game night/hang night. The way I used to do with my group of friends in high school. Topher said his friends were awesome and friendly and wholesome. Luke had such a great time and spent more events with them while we stayed in Logandale. I hope this showed Luke how good friends can be and how great it is to have friends in the church! Maybe it will influence his friend making decisions at Warner Robins.

 Sterling went to Vegas to put us on the housing list. He had to go to the nearest military base (Nellis) because his military online access wasn’t working! He brought back pizza for dinner.

Wednesday The kids went back to the Houston house. Ster, Eliza, Mom and I went to the thrift shops in Overton. Then we got lunch at the diner there. We picked up the kids and went back to the house. We went to the reservoir one more time. Dad was recording a youtube Come Follow Me video so he stayed home to do that. We had a great evening even though it had cooled off. It wasn’t a hot day! Luke doesn’t like to swim anymore but I made him take the kayak out for one spin. He went around a tree and came back to the land and was done.

When we returned to the house dad was still recording. So we all went to the basement to keep the noise away from his microphone. We watched the Never Ending Story and ate ice cream. While we all took turns one at a time taking a shower in the basement shower. That was fun! The kids enjoyed the movie! But Sterling, despite realizing he has never actually watched the film before, chose not to watch. He went upstairs to play a video game.

 We said goodbye to my parents Wednesday night. They had to leave early Thurs for an appointment in Vegas. We got up at 7am and left at 8am. We had to wake Eliza to say goodbye. Maddie remained asleep.

We drove up to St George and stopped to look at a truck Sterling saw online at a dealership. We were actually at the wrong location and it took a while to figure that out. Sterling’s phone internet wasn’t working so he couldn’t check. But eventually we found the right dealership and the truck! And it was actually pretty great. We went for a test drive together and decided this was the truck. Sterling would buy it! He really was hoping to find a truck before going to Georgia and it wasn’t looking promising. But then, we found the one. I left Sterling there to do the paperwork and drive the truck away.

I drove the kids to Parowan to meet Alissa at her house. I had some things to drop off to her. Athena and the girls were happy for a chance to play together again!
They were pretending to be dogs fighting and wrestling but I saw it…Athena could be a wrestler in school! She is strong enough and built for it. She loves wrestling because he daddy taught her to wrestle and fight. She didn’t seem to care for the idea when I said it but I have a plan. I will show her. When we get to Georgia I will find out if one of the schools has a wrestling team and take Athena to watch one match. Let her experience seeing the sport so that if she gets a chance to join a team she will know if she wants to try or not.

Sterling met us at Alissa’s then we said goodbye to Alissa’s family. We drove two cars but stayed together the rest of the drive.

In Provo we arrived with just twenty minutes to spare. We had a dinner date with Matt and Maria at Mom’s house at 5pm. Mom made cheesy potato soup with vegetables and bread rolls. We were able to visit with them and that was nice. Maria had also brought with her the two pairs of prescription glasses Ty had picked out at her store a week or so prior. She works at a prescription store in Orem.

Friday we went swimming at the Provo Rec center at 11am. Simone brought her kids. Hannah brought hers. Mom came too. Luke stayed home though. Since, he doesn’t like swimming anymore.

Simone and her kids hung out with us at Dad’s house until it was time to go to Leatherbys. The long awaited event! Everyone came! Aubrianne and some of her kids (Rosie and Jimmy) didn’t make it. Stewart also missed out. But nobody else was willing to miss this! We eat like kings and queens when we go to Leatherbys!

Athena and Maddie and Chloe are all good friends! But Athena sat with just Maddie this time.

Trevor and Travis with their kids came to Dad’s house after Leatherbys.

Saturday morning was free fishing day! Athena was excited to get to go fishing. Ty and Luke were forced to go. I stayed home to write blog entries, work out and catch up on stuff.

 

May 18

Things to miss about Japan

My neighborhood

My real friends

Pickleball weekly

The school

Things I wont miss

The allergies (I hope I wont have them in GA)

Living on base and having them always on my case

Japan traffic

Japan crowds

Japan prices

 

Dear Journal,

It is May 18, 2023. My family is in the PCS process (permanent change of station). We are out-processing from Yokota Air Base in preparation to fly from Japan to America.
This week has been a long time coming. Meaning, I have longed for it.
When we moved to Japan it was, as is for most American military who move here, a huge struggle. Filled with longing. Longing for family who are still back in The States. Longing for familiarity. Longing for comfort and peace. You see, you don’t “belong” here and it is felt within.
I went through depression, as I have more recently learned is normal for wives in my situation (specifically here). That it is part of the process of moving to Japan and leaving your relatives in The States.

The first year in Japan was the hardest. Then it improved steadily. I felt more and more needed, wanted and appreciated. I found places that I did fit…I did belong. Within the elementary school, the squadron, the ward and the community. Pickleball became a regular thing. The group meets once a week at minimum. We’ve played through the wind and the rain. We’ve played in the gym when the weather was too harsh to permit playing.

It is through Pickleball that I have created real friendships. Stronger than at church activities. Stronger than at work in the elementary school.
We play and we chat and sometimes we go out to lunch together!

 

In the past I’ve always tried making real friends wherever I live. I’ve tried by inviting ladies to do fun things. By sharing information about my life and even vulnerable things…that we could bond over. But it did not always work. Real connections are not so easy to form. I have found that regular Pickleball practice is the best way to make those real connections. I will remember that moving forward. In Georgia I will get a Pickleball net of my own and find or create a group to play together.

Through my time as a keyspouse I have been appreciated and praised for my volunteering and dedication. It was fun getting so much recognition. But, I don’t want to be a keyspouse anymore. Did that… moving on.
I loved working with the kids and the teachers at Joan K. Mendel Elementary. I love that school. I love that the teachers are allowed to take their kids out to the playgrounds for brain breaks or reading or lessons whenever they choose. I love that the teachers and staff seek ways to improve the education experience for the children. I have made wonderful friends there. But I want to move on from that as well.

So many wonderful experiences and memories to cherish for the rest of my life!

Four years is a long time. It is a long time to live somewhere you didn’t choose to live and don’t necessarily want to live. However, the first year is always the hardest. And the longer you stay the greater the experience. Maybe that is why some families choose to stay in Japan for 17+ years. But for me, four is enough. I am ready.

 

Tuesday my family moved from our garden unit, our home, to TLF (Temporary Lodging Facility: the tower for members moving in or out). It was a little unsettling for Athena. She was excited to see the tower and our room but she is sad at the same time. This is the first move in her memory. As if experiencing it for the first time. She was 5 years old at our last move.

Wednesday we became homeless. We had the final out inspection of the home and turned the keys in.

The children are all excited for their summer break from school. They are not excited to leave all of their friends behind.

My kids have handled losing friends one by one very well. Saying goodbye to one friend at a time as they move away. But this. This is losing them all in one big swoop.

Athena is good about finding friends to connect with that live near our house. Tiberias has had a mediocre time finding friends but when they discover how fun LARPing is they want to be his friend. He has a good sized group of friends. LARPing is just giving older kids, pre teens and a teens an excuse to stay kids. To continue playing as they did as little kids. Without feeling embarrassed about it.

Luke has a lot of friends here. He loves being in social situations. Which is a huge improvement from when we first moved here. Luke didn’t have real friends before we lived here.
Don’t get me wrong, he will stay home playing video games and watching tv with Ty most of the time if his parents were not pushing him to get out and spend time with his friends. But that’s not Luke specific…most teens are that way.

 

There is a feeling in the air. Something has severely shifted my world since moving into TLF two days ago. I walk out into my neighborhood but it is not longer the same. I know that my friends are still here in their houses and their lives. But it feels different. I don’t feel like I live here any longer.
And I guess, technically I don’t.

This morning I walked over to Leigh’s house. Seeking normalcy. Seeking time with a friend before I leave her behind. We took a walk together on this warm morning. The weather has finally heated up. In Japan’s winter you long for warm days but when they hit you wonder why you asked for it. When it hits you remember what the summers are like. The hot, humid, uncomfortable summers. And you want the warm air to stop. To stay put. But you know it will shoot up like someone pushed upward the thermostat on the wall.

 

After a little walk with Leigh and her toddler Ezra in his stroller we went inside Leigh’s air conditioned house. She had a Sayonara doll for me to sign. Sayonara dolls being an American tradition now in Japan. It is a Kokeshi doll and a paper scroll combined into one. The Americans love having their friends sign goodbyes…just like high schoolers do with their yearbooks.
I had one at my 15^th wedding vow renewal last year as a guest book.
The teachers lounge at Mendel always has a few laying on a table of people who are moving away and want goodbye notes from everyone. I don’t always know the teachers well but if I know them at all I humor them and write something down. “Thank you for all you’ve done at Mendel. Good luck with the next chapter of your life. Love, Tiffany” or something similar.

The relief society presidency got me a little Sayonara doll and had sisters in the ward sign it. I did not think I wanted one but now that I have it and I’ve read it…I love it! It’s so personal and precious. I will take it to my birthday lunch this Friday and see if anyone there hasn’t sign it yet.

Anyway, I’ve been signing a few lately. I am not the only person moving this year from Yokota. Liz Monson came over last night to get me to sign hers. And even though Leigh isn’t moving yet she decided she needed written goodbyes from her friends that are leaving this year. Smart thinking.

 

Trip To Idaho

Sunday we drove 5 1/2 hours from Mom's to Jon's. Jon's family was tired from their busy life and having relatives over just before us...for Sarah's graduation. We missed the graduation on purpose...because their family wanted less relatives crowding them and staying at their house. We were tired from our travels. So we all hung out and rested Sunday after we arrived. The kids got reacquainted. Jon made a delicious dinner. Cream cheese chicken with fettuccine noodles. Monday was memorial day. Jon had work off and the kids had school off. The kids mostly stayed home. We made them go to the park when we played pickleball. Emily wasn't feeling well so she stayed home to rest. Jon, Ster, Spencer and I played pickleball. They have a nice walk from their house to the park..along a green and pretty water canal with ducks. Athena loved the ducklings and the squirrels and the birds. The grownups left the kids and went to lunch at Zupa's cafe. Then hit Duck Donuts. The donuts were cake like ,too hot for frosting (so it was melted icing) and expensive. I didn't like them. For dinner we had butter chicken curry and nan. It was yummy. We played Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza. 

Jon and Emily did a ceremony to give us wands he made himself. With certificates they made too. After the ceremony Athena was trying out her wand and nothing magical was happening. She said "My wand doesn't work". Then someone said "you are not allowed a wand until age eleven...so it won't work just yet"

To be fair...in Universal studios you buy a wand and you walk around using it in the Potter themed town and magical stuff and sounds occur. But these wands are made of pure wood and we are not at Universal.

 Tuesday Spencer, Lucy and Ben went to school. Pickleball again: Jon, Ster, Luke and I. Luke caught on fast and was good at it. Yay We took Ty for a haircut. Yay. So handsome when his hair isn't grown out. Ty wants to grow his hair but I can't stand it . And Ster wants to buzz both boys heads to military cuts but I fight for their right to have hair.

We went to Target because it is a super short walk from their house. It reminded me how much higher the prices are there than Walmart.

When the kids were all back from school and clubs we took whoever wanted to and went to the YMCA pool. It was Ty, Athena, Lucy, Sarah, Sterling, Jon and Tiff. Spencer was at baseball practice. The swim test was easy. We were happy about that. It meant Athena could use the water slide and Ty could do that and the diving board. Also, the hot tub allows kids accompanied by adults. So, it was a great time. One Athena almost missed out on because she left her swim suit in Provo! Athena has more confidence than I did at her age. She is as bad at swimming as I was back then. But she proudly claims she can swim. When I was her age I claimed I was a bad swimmer.
For dinner Emily made homemade macaroni and cheese and chicken nuggets. Jon made homemade french fries and broccoli. We watched The Mario movie until bedtime. Wednesday morning Jon made a full breakfast of sausage and pancakes and fruit. We said goodbye and hit the road.

Luke was feeling depressed most of our stay in Idaho. It's hard moving away from your life, home and all your friends. I felt bad for him. We (Ster, Jon and I) talked about reasons for depression and validated his feelings. Luke spent a lot of time laying around on their tall soft carpet (we had hard floors and rough, short carpet in Japan) and claimed the hall near the boys' bedroom in the basement was his Hall of Depression.
We did make him hang out with others and participate in stuff some of the time.
One time I walked past Luke on the carpet he was wearing dark sunglasses and he looked like a COOL dude.With his Luigi hat, long curly hair and glasses. Nobody has ever looked so cool wallowing as Luke did.

Once we got back to Provo Luke started to feel like his depression was going away. He is feeling better and hopefully that will continue. We just want our Luke to be happy and healthy and safe.

Spouse Appreciation Flight

 

Spouses’ Appreciation Flight

Once a year the Air Force at Yokota celebrates the spouses who support their military members…with a military flight on a cool air craft. Military members are not invited.

I have always turned down the opportunity. No, thank you! Because, I don’t like flying on planes.

This year I felt impressed to sign myself up. And after my paragliding experience I felt confident. It would be a good practice flight before getting on a plane with the kids for a long overseas flight next Saturday.
Tons of spouses met at 9:30am near the flightline. We signed in and hung out waiting for our turn for the briefing. I saw friends from church and friends from school. Jaymee Warner was there too. It was fun to visit and hang out with them on a beautiful morning waiting for an exciting flight. There were three groups before my group to fly so I had to wait all morning.
Mary Wagner and Amy Higgins whom I know from Mendel Elementary were in my group. So we hung out. We played a card game Ms. Higgins brought called Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza. We only played one round …one game …but it was really fun. So I messaged Sterling to order it on Amazon.com so we can play with family this summer.

Brunch was provided during the brief…an assortment from the bakery. I am a sucker for chocolate frosted donuts so I had one. During the brief one presenter compared some of the flight experiences to a roller coaster. At this remark some spouses quietly cheered while others, on the other hand, suffered in silence. After the brief we began to discuss it to see if it is comparable to a roller coaster because there are plenty of people who , like me, just don’t do roller coasters! Some of the people present experienced an Osprey before and said it is not like a roller coaster. We calmed down enough to press forward.

Lunch was served, Subway, and my team still wasn’t up for our flight. I skipped Subway because Ster and I planned to go to lunch after.
The first time given to my group was that we would fly at 11:45am. At 11:45 they told us we had fifteen more minutes to wait. At noon they lined us up to get on the CV-22 Osprey then told us we had another fifteen minutes to wait. Lol. Why did they have us there at 9:30am if we were not flying until 12:20?

When we finally walked to the plane the wind from the helicopter like propellers whipped us all. We wore ear and eye safety wear and we boarded the plane. It was smaller than I imagined it would be. And the sight of the seats and seatbelts freaked me out. I seriously wanted to turn around and leave. What was I scared of? The turns and any motions that would make me feel a sinking feeling as well as the fact that the back doors would be open during the flight!

But I buckled up and found ways to be brave. I focused on the inside of the plane…small details. Then I focused on the flight line ground out the open door. I imagined being in the sky and seeing the earth…because that is something I like. I imagined the take off, because that was making me nervous. I told myself in my head things such as “This is like a helicopter and they take off going upward and with force. This is normal. This is how it goes.” It worked.

The craft was super shaky even without trafficking or flying. Just sitting in place, propellers on. “This is normal.”

When we took off it didn’t happen with as much force as the briefer had said. It was a much easier flight than he made me think. It was a nice flight. We couldn’t see Mt Fuji today even though the sky was blue. It was a beautiful day but a bit windy.
Having the back of the plane open was nice. It actually made it better because I hate planes and like seeing the earth. Now I know this about myself. 
It wasn’t amazing but it was fun. We flew for thirty minutes….over Hakone and Tokyo. And luckily I had so many friends to hang out with all morning during the wait. If they had not been there then it would not have been worth it…except to make me feel more confident about flying on planes. A practice run before next week.

The movers had been at our house yesterday and today. We had served the Japanese workers Subway for lunch. There were not a lot of movers but they worked hard and fast! Especially compared to American workers.
Today I left Sterling home with the movers for my spouses’ flight day. They were done taking our household goods by lunch time.

I picked up Sterling and we drove to Zona Voce for lunch. We enjoyed pizza and salad. Then went home to our empty house. About an hour later the military temporary furniture loan arrived. A dining set, a livingroom set up, beds. Perfect. Luke in currently living in what used to be the office. All the kids have their own rooms. And the boys have big, single beds. No more bunk bed!

Tomorrow is Saturday. Ty’s farewell party is tomorrow. We were going to do it at the USO/Yujo center but they will be closed due to a scheduled power outage. So, Ty moved the party to the Sakura Shell and park in our neighborhood. I will serve pizza and maybe cookies. Ty and his friends can play.

Sunday is Mother’s day. I want to watch home movies and show them the videos and pictures of my paragliding adventure. I want ice cream and cookies for mother’s day dessert.

Monday we will sell the trampoline and I will mow the lawn for the last time. Tuesday we move into TLF. Wednesday we do our house inspection to show we have cleaned the house enough to move out. Thursday is the last day of school for our kids. Except that Friday is Athena’s field day at Mendel! So, she will probably go to the fun field day.

Friday is my birthday lunch with my friends. And I hope to play pickleball a few times that week with my friends. I am taking my pickleball set with me all summer to play with Sterling or if someone else wants to learn. But really it’s my friends I will miss. My pickleball friends.

Saturday we fly out of Japan. May 20.